I am healing

Those drops of rain remind me, everything starts afresh today. I can breathe the rains today, I can let all the emotions flow. Let them go. Swim in the pool of my own angels and demons, again. Drenched in the blessings from the sky, keeping the umbrella of resistance away. I give myself a chance to be innocent again.

I just need to flow today, with chords on my guitar, tune it with the beats from the heart. Fly away, with the winds that sing to my fingers. Heal, with those drops of kindness from the skies, giving the skies another chance, they can fix the paths for so many, today, maybe, just maybe it will fix a few wounds of my own.

Someone up there wants me to grow. Or as someone said, chisel myself out of who I was. Nothing has gone wrong, it never does. Things just don't turn out the way you wanted them to be. I need no band aids anymore, nor do I need to live with the pain. All I really need, is to heal again.

Life is a train journey she said, be grateful to the passengers while they give you company, they will have to get down someday, someplace, go away. Just look out for those who stay, because those who chose not to leave are really the ones meant to be. There could be passengers who you did not know exist, others, did not think you did. But it will all turn out well, just keep the seats of your heart open, let someone else take that place.

How do you know so much? I ask, she smiles and says, I have been loved, loved and lost it all, but here I am, finding another heart to love, I created this one. She holds her newborn and kisses him. Maybe she is right, she always was, I should have let it all go, with the last trip I made to nostalgia, I should have known, that is not the direction I want to go.

There is just one chaos I need to understand, my own. No one needs to know, they shouldn't, they need to heal on their own too. This is another chance from the skies, to show me more hope than I can perceive. Kiss the lips of silence, and hum to the songs of my own breath.

Be at peace with the past, it is long gone, present, because I am alive, and the future, because I will be a warrior again, the soldier who survives, the hope who never dies. I will be a hero, maybe not for anyone else, just guardian of my own muscle that beats.

Somehow though, it almost feels like I have been here before, I have felt this before, for a different passenger, on a different seat, for a different reason, to a different route. For a different answer to my questions. I only realize now, maybe that passenger was me. I was the one I need to make peace with.

Today I will sing a little louder, laugh a little harder, smile a little longer, because today I am healing.